My life Spin off
by Lisa Morningstar
Summary: -stpry frozen- I felt the floor beneath me disappear and fell into the pit of eternal darkness. Tomorrow there would be no world for me to return to, no safe haven to retreat to, no magical school to go to. I stopped looking for my wand,.
1. Prologue

**  
*note: Hello Good readers! This fanfiction is a spinoff on the fanfic ''My life'' By Sara Mcclearing.  
She is a very close friend of mine and gave her consent to me for writing this. We'll try to upload at the same time, and keep the storyline going ^_^  
Hope you enjoy! R&R If you have any tips!**

Proloog

_I sat on the floor, staring into the lifeless eyes of my former friends, as the dark lord stepped into the great hall. No sound came trough to my head, no feeling came trough to my mind, no air reached my lungs. I wasn't able to move, I just sat there._

_Images of blood and green spell light clouded my vision, and as I tried to look around, I realized that I was in foreign country. There was no-one there to help me up upon my feet, nobody to wipe away the tears that were slowly cascading down my checks. No friendly or known face to tell me everything was going to be alright._

_The cold body of the boy lying next to me, seems to look at me in disgust as I tried to ignore the blood that was tickling down my arm and looked for my wand. As I looked up at the new king of the world, I felt the floor beneath me disappear and fell into the pit of eternal darkness. Tomorrow there would be no world for me to return to, no safe haven to retreat to, no magical school to go to._

_I stopped looking for my wand._

_His red eyes seemed to linger on all of us for a few seconds, and I stopped crying.  
The sun was slowly creeping up to the sky again, shining a weak light on the new world the dark lord created. And I died with the light of the last star that night._

_The war was lost.  
And I just sat there, watching._

**Note* :A little short I know, just being true to the original ;)**


	2. Schadows of the soul

**1. Shadow of the soul**

I turn my head from the disturbing sight in front of me, and tried very hard not to empty my stomach right there and then. The smell of the rotting muggel corpses made this very hard for me, and I took two steps back, with my left hand covering my mouth and my right searching for Sarah's. When I could find her hand in the dark, I risked looking over my shoulder to get a glance of her face, just in time to see her back disappearing around the corner.  
I immediately rand after her, it gave me and excuse to stop standing in the blood and guts on the floor. Leaving the horrid stink behind me, I rushed after Sarah.  
She had always been a better runner than me, and it was only with the greatest effort that I managed to keep up with her. Since the start of this war, we have been as close as you can possibly get. Were I go She goes, and wherever Sarah goes you can count on me being there just a few seconds behind her. Never since the day that I've turned twelve have we been apart. I couldn't stand the idea of being without her, in this war or the next.

Truth be told, is was hard work keeping up with Sarah. She had a big mouth, and although mine was bigger, she was always the one getting us into trouble. The difference with me and Sarah was and always has been, the fact that I see my survival as one of the main goals in life. Sometime, I wonder what Sarah's are.  
Today, it seems I was giving a chance to find out.

To my horrible surprise, Sarah was heading to the one place we could get killed in an eye wink and where nobody would give a damn. I called out to her, but she just kept on going. I ran till my lungs burned and my troth was soar, then I caught her arm. "Not Diagon Ally Sarah, it's not save." I panted, as I tried to pull her back to a pass I could handle. She looked at me with utter hatred in her eyes, ''NO place is save these days.'' She spat and ript her arm out of my grasp.  
In my heart I knew that she was right, no place was safe. But my fear told me that there had to be a place at least safer that Diagon Ally. Any place would be better than ''deatheater centale'', where the hooded nightmare could jump out from any corner or shop. As I gathered all my breath an resumed the killing pass Sarah had set, I also realized that diagon ally was the only way for us to get home right now. Fear gave me wings and we fled over the snow covered streets on our way to safety.

When we finally turned the last corner, I was running next to Sarah. ''Just two more streets.'' I muttered softly, to save my breath for the final sprint. The moment I said it, I felt this was going to end very wrong. Sarah's voice rang trough the nearly deserted streets, and my heart stopped for a moment when her voice and my eyes came to the same conclusion. "Crap! Lisa! Put on the breaks!" I cursed under my breath and heeled to her command immediately, but it was already to late.  
The snow beneath our feet gave way, and we both skittered trough the wit substance, falling to our faces and sliding trough the street before bumping to an abrupt stop to a couple of legs. I never saw the hooded man coming, and now I cursed the fact that I thought we were almost home free.

I stared at the shiny shoes in front of my nose, and felt Sarah stir next to me. I quickly put my hand on her back, hoping frantically that she would keep her big mouth shut, and her body on the floor. I dared to tilled my head a bit to the left, trying to give those reckless green eyes of her a message, but noticed she was staring at the face of one of the deatheaters. I could barely hold my hand still, If she would say the wrong thing now, we were going to die right there and then.

"What would be you pleasure, My Lord?" She finally said in the sweetest voice I have ever hear her use. I took a deep breath and glanced up at the man standing in front of me. He raised one eyebrow, and seemed to give me a disapproving look. I blinked in surprise. I immediately regretted it, when his brown eyes narrowed and he opened his mouth. "Leave them Draco. They are way to young, even for your taste." I closed my eyes, and awaited his response. There came non, just the crisping of the snow as they started to walk away. I didn't know how fast to get to my feet, and neither did Sarah. I was ready to resume our journey in that same second, but the man that had been called draco said something as the were walking away. "They probably won't last the winter, it hardly calls for my intervention."

Before my temper got the better of me, Sarah's simply took over. Before I knew it, she was standing there, shouting, and there was snow flying trough the air. I just stood there, frozen to the floor as the blond-haired man sprung around and pointed his wand at us. ''You little bitch!'' My feet worked a little better than my head at that moment, and in a second I found myself running next to Sarah, in a pass I would only run to save my ass from being so brutally cursed that I wouldn't make it trough the day.

God, she was going to get me AND her killed if she kept on doing this. She might have been right, but it didn't mean she had to tell him that! I realized that I would have done the same thing if she hadn't been there, and grinned as we ran into a little side street. I could hear Sarah mumbling a little mantra, _'' weren't following us, it was a harmless curse, they just wanted to scare me.''_ I had been to scared to look if they had been following us, and I was pretty sure that the cursed they would have used were not harmless.. But I started to repeat her in my mind anyway, while we slumped breathlessly against the wall.

When my lungs stopped burning, I managed a smile and felt the need to express my happiness of surviving yet and other day. I also looked at Sarah and thought it was best to tell her it was not a day we should repeat any time soon.

"You do realize that lying like that will leave a mark on your conscience? One day, you will start to believe the nonsense you're saying and I'll loose you." I said to her, getting to my feet and putting my hands on my hips. I looked down at her, waiting for a snappy responds. But there came non, she just smiled and gave me her hand.

As I helped her up, I thought about what I had just said. Did we have any conscience to leave a mark on left? We haven't done an awful lot in this war yet, but if the time was there, would we be thinking of our conscience while killing of scum like we just met? And were our souls not already lost, the day this war began?


	3. Little Hatchlings

***Note:  
**_So far so good, replaces all chapters with new and improved (hopefully) error free story ^_^  
R&R If you have and suggestion's!_

****

Chapter 2: Little Hatchlings

Sara and I resumed our journey silently. I kept my head bowed and only occasionally looked up to see where we we're going. Although Sara did say anything, I knew she was thinking about home, and all the trouble we would be in if our guardian found about this. In my mind I underlined the word _if _with a great big red marker. If was the key to our salvation, and the only tiny word that was going to safe us from Hermione Granger's wrath.

_If _she were to find our,we would probably be locked in the attic until Sara agreed to shut her big mouth forever and only to bake cookie's. Chances of that are just as big as me wearing a bright pink dress and dance the salsa in ''diagny Ally'', proclaiming my love for muggel murder. I was going to grow old and die in a attic, right next to one of the beheaded house elf's of the black's… IF, I kept holding on to the _if_ part, by the look on Sara's face she agreed.

When we finally reached the place we called home, Sara cracked open the front door and gestured me to get in. I did not hesitated to do so, and was glad to be able to breath in the familiar musk smell of the old rebel hid out. Although it would never smell quite as the old spice the house of my long forgotten parents wore, I still felt safe. Sara and I have been living here for nearly six years now, but I never forgot the sent of the house I was born in.  
In the six years I walked trough the old corridors of the rebel hide out, I never forgot the painting of my mother that used to hang in our own hallway. Every spell Hermione teached us while training reminded me of our last night at Hogwarts. Every time I entered this house, I reminded me of everything I had lost and the way my life was going to look like from now on.

Unlike Sara, I took the world for what it was. I had no hopes of regaining the life I was suppose to lead, no intention of waiting the war out. The wasn't a fibre in my body that didn't know this war by heart. Although we had never been in a real fight before, I knew it was my destiny to do so and I gave my everything to training for that moment. Hermione was always telling us about freedom, honour and how the world would be after the war. To be honest I didn't really, I just wanted to survive for as long as I could, Voldemort or no Voldemort.

While I was secretly revisiting the past, Sara had brushed by me and was now leading the way to the kitchen. Suddenly an loud, and strangely familiar voice rang trough the hallway. "I'm not about to repeat myself Hermione!" It shouted aggressively and I almost jumped trough the roof. I saw Sara freeze in terror, and forgot the breath for a moment. ''If you don't keep you little hatchlings in check, they are better of dead next time they run into Draco Malfoy! Babysitting wasn't part of our deal and maybe next time, I won't be able to convince Draco that they aren't way to young for his taste. Because by then, he might be sober enough to realize that is nothing more than a lie." It was him, the man with the brown eyes we just met, I was sure. There was a death eather in the house. Stransfict and unable to move I just kept staring at the swinging kitchen door, there was a death eater in the house..

My mind just kept repeating this information, when the voice of Hermoine Granger overwrote the system, '' "Don't you dare threaten me in my own house Zambini!" There was a small_ ''WHAM'' _sound as the door brutally smacked into the wall and a tall dark man flew into the hall. He rammed into the wall, face first, and flew to the floor in a heap of tangled robes. I suddenly regained my abilities to breath, and felt the strange urge to start laughing hysterically creeping up from my stomach. Unfortunately Hermoine also came into the _hallway –a little more graceful than the deatheater - _, wand still raised and wearing an expression that probably would kill Voldemort. Sara and I tried to blend into the wall, but we already received such a filthy look for our young teacher, that told me Christmas was not coming this year. _If_ she found out, was no longer an option, we were officially going to die in the attic.

Fortunately, the deatheater on the floor was going to die right now, so I was not going to die without the pleasure of seeing that. Hermoine turned her full attention to the man on the floor, who was very busy to untangle himself from his robes, and was waving with her wand. "Lets just get one thing clear, before you leave Zambini. Just keep your end of the bargain and everything will be fine. My 'little hatchlings' as you so called them, are able to fend for themselves perfectly. After al that is what they are being taught here." Hermione's voice sounded deadly calm, but the wand was moving dangerously op and in in her hand, ready to attack at any moment.

Blaise Zambini, however, didn't not seem to be impressed by her treat at all. He had gotten up en was straitening his robes. I could feel Sara stir next to me, probably as confused as I was, and gave her a meaningful or rather treating look. If she was going to use that big mouth of her's now, I was going to kill her myself. I have the feeling she understood, cause even when the man walked to the door and gave her a challenging stare, she did not react. There was an exchange between them however, and I was horrified when the man didn't look away from her as he began to speak.

"Silly little girl. You better lean to keep you tongue behind your teeth or your it might get you killed one day. There are worse things on the loose that Draco Malfoy, compared to them he's nothing more than an angel, straight from heaven. If you are smarter then you look, you won't go outside for a while, the blonde devil is furious…" I felt a wave of anger was over me, and saw Sara taking a step forward, obviously not thinking of backing down to a deatheater. Almost automatically I took a step forward with her, and reached for my wand.

"Maybe I don't care about dying, do you really believe I've got something left? I died six years ago, but my body just hasn't caught up with my soul yet. Your kind made sure I didn't have anything left to love, but you forgot to kill the reason for me to fight, myself." She took a step towards him. As always I followed.

At first Blaise seemed stunned, his brown eyes met mine for a second and I tightened my grip on my wand. A sly grin appeared on his face as soon as his eyes had left mine, "What a rude mistakes of 'my kind.' I almost jumped at him to punch him right in the face, but Hermoine jumped in. "Just shut your big mouth before something comes out that you really don't want to say in this house Zambini," she muttered softly, but the man closed his mouth without making any sound.

He looked as me for a moment, my wand at the ready and then shifted his gaze to Hermoine and Sara. There was an ode look on his rather handsome face, when he turned away. Watching his back as he was leaving, I realized it was the look of a man who had just decided it wasn't worth it. ''I'll see you Granger.''

Anger flared up in me, and I turned my back on Sara and Hermoine as I stared stamping my way trough the hallway and up the stairs. Little hatchling, I secretly wished Sara's big mouth had cause a fight and that we had gotten the chance to curse him into oblivion.

***Note2:**  
_It might take awhile before I upload again, Sara hasn't uplaoded for awhile now, so I would have to wait till she does or ask her how the story has to proceed in order to stay a good spinoff ^_^_


	4. Road to Destruction

**Hello my good samaritans!  
As always I follwo up on the posting of Sarah!  
I have inside information as how to continue (not saying I like it :P but hey.. You wanna be a writer, you better be prepared ;)) so don't be alarmd!**

Road to destruction

Sitting on the edge of my bed I heard the door in the hall swing to a close with a loud bang. Sarah's loud footsteps on the stairs followed quickly and some yelling from Hermione seemed to echoed trough they entire house. I didn't react to the slamming door or the sudden weight that pushed the mattress down. I could feel her green eyes burning a whole into the side of my head, but I refused to look at her as she shifted her weight uncomfortably. It only took a few minutes of silence before she quietly left my room again.

In my mind I called her back in and yelled at her till there was no end, but my heart wouldn't allow it so I just sat there listening to her footsteps in the hall, and the door next to mine falling shut. It wasn't like I was upset with her for getting me grounded AGAIN, or for getting me almost killed AGAIN, I wasn't even mad about the fact she had been acting like a total nutjob once more,..

No this time it was different, for the first time Sarah had effectively made me known to a deatheater. I had seen it in his face, he was memorizing ours and had tasted our names on his toughn. Worst of all, he had commanded me to to his bidding. As if a grounding from Hermoine wasn't enough, this deatheater had to challenge our survival skills?

''If you are smarter then you look, you won't go outside for a while, the blonde devil is furious…"

Al though he was speaking to Sarah I distinctively caught his eye as he said it, and I could feel a rock dropping to the bottom of my stomach this was not a request or a warning, it was an order. The anger had fade when Sarah took hold of the situation as she always did, but somehow it had not satisfied me like it used to.

I can't remember the first time Sarah said the exact same thing as I would have liked to say, if only I had the strength to give a damn, but I do remember the moment when I decided that she was my yin. It was my first year with the rebellion. Hermoine took me in, covered in blood and gore, stuck me in a room with unfamiliar faces. There was one girl, sitting in the fares corner of the room.  
Her blond hairs had been bound together in a tight braid, and her green eyes had a strange glassy look in them, as if the inhabitant of the body was currently on vacation. Probably skipped rent that month also.. the bags under her eyes looked more like army markings the something ells and she refused to let anyone come into contact with her empty frame.  
In the days that followed I saw people try, when we were at dinner people would end up with forks in they're hands, cleanup mobs would fly around, and after a week she started screaming. I had never seen such a thing, she would take nothing from nobody. She was the apocalypse.

As I remained silent and practised my spells, ignoring everyone and taking everything as it came, Sarah took nothing as it came. So it came to be that in on a lazy afternoon while collecting food, she almost cute my life very short. Now I think of it, it was very similar to what happened today.. We had to hid in a dumpster, I got hit by some kind op burning spell and I still have the scares of that day on my arm.

When we got home Hermoine pulled us both aside, me first.

_''Do you think you can simply go up in smoke if you keep pretending your not here?'' I just stared at her, what did this women want from me? I sat down on the nearest chair and just stared, ''Lisa, you've got to start standing up for yourself, I have no use for a ghost or suicide missions for that matter.'' I shook my head, ''It wasn't me, it was the blond girl I was just a long for the rid. I'm always just along for the ride'' My voice must have sounded hollow, cause I could see her face twisting in something that would look like she was going to cry. ''You have a mind of your own Lisa. You can change your future.''_

I shrugged and walked out of the room. I lingered in the hallway, thinking about the caretakers words when I saw Sarah entering the sitting room. Slowly I approached the door, she blond girl was sitting in a defying position not bothering to give hermoine a hint of emotion beyond her hatred for the world.

That night Sarah sat next to each other at the dining table. I never left her side again.

Today I felt betrayed, she had been angry and lost but in her little conversation with Blaise she gave hermoine the answer.

''_Do you keep heading nowhere or do you want to make a difference in the world?"_I was getting the awkward feeling that Sarah's goals had changed in that moment, and they were no longer the same as mine. The dream of gliding trough the war as anonymously as I came in it was whisked away by her sudden change of attitude and the feeling that I was her yan became stronger.

It was one thing for Sarah to inevitably change her future and mine in the process, but it was another for a deatheater and a insane hermoine to do so.

In my mind a gave the two of them the same defying look that Sarah would were and slowly I got up from the bed. I dragged my feet across the floor until I reached my door, I tiptoed into the hall.  
Suddenly it was as if the wind carried my trough the house, I had to get out, and I had to get out now. I've had enough of the rebellion, of deatheater, of lord voldemort all pushing and pulling me into a future I didn't want and didn't need.

While storming trough the main hall I cashed into something solid. ''Where's the fire?'' Gathering was what left of my sanity I took a step back and looked up into the worrying brown eyes belonging to Ron Weasly. My small form was nothing in comparison to the big red head but despite myself I managed to pushed him aside, ''No fire, more like a god dammed cremation.'' I screeched while make fast time to the front door.

''Lisa where do you think you're going?'' I heard him call out to me, I slammed the door behind me as I stumbled into the snowy streets. '' I'm not waiting for the moment someone finds out what's best for me.'' I'm my mind, I added – non staying here waiting for Zambini to turn on us-

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